Last week, I interviewed an incredibly brave and outstanding woman, Pradeepa, who went through 3 miscarriages, 3 failed IUIs, and 8 IVFs, and then was able to complete her family through the adoption process. The decision she and her husband made was based on their open and honest conversation about their dream of having a family. The fulfillment of their family’s dream required courage to follow through with what is important to them — independent of what anyone thought or have done.

As the North American Director of the largest, privately-owned medical groups in Europe — which has state of the art fertility facilities and some of the industry’s highest success rates — I get the privilege to speak with intended parents in all stages of the fertility journey. 

And through this process, I find that couples answering “What Is Your Dream?” is one of the hardest questions to answer. Yet so much of a couple’s success depends on their honest and open communication to find that answer.

To find the answer, a couple must explore all facets of the fertility journey. The questions are limitless:  Are you living your dream or the dream someone else has for you? What are some truly non-negotiable elements for you?  How much do you believe that you will achieve it? What odds would you give yourself? How far are you willing to go? 

All of us who go through the fertility journey have a dream to one day have a baby, and I believe with all my heart that YOU DESERVE every moment of your dream. And taking ownership of your Dream can be a determining factor for success.

For Pradeepa, adoption was part of her and her husband’s dream. For many of our patients, surrogacy is vitally important because it allows for the dream of genetic connection to be realized. There is not a “single” dream that fits all. There can only be a unique dream that matches you and your family. 

Here are 3 vital steps in Taking Ownership of Your Dream:

  1.   Be willing to bet on yourself. You may succeed if nobody else believes in you, but you will never succeed if you don’t believe in yourself.

I know this advice is hard to hear when you are experiencing the lowest times of your fertility journey. As Pradeepa described, just when it feels like you have made one step forward, you can come crashing down in a matter of minutes.  

The level of self-doubt and self-judgement is unbearable. But the moment you stop believing in the dream for yourself, the dream is lost.  Keep believing in yourself! And fertility coaches, like Pradeepa, can be a great asset to help you grow through ups and downs without losing faith in yourself. 

  1.   “Lead” your life instead of “accepting your life.”  Make the right decisions and manage those decisions daily.

The power of choice is the greatest power a person possesses. Pradeepa and her husband made their unique choice. Whatever your choice is – the most important thing is that you are leading with YOUR Choice. At Adonis Fertility International, we believe in the power of knowledge. We know that our choices are limited by our level of awareness. This is why Adonis Program Coordinators and doctors strive to expand your knowledge of options, to elevate the level of awareness, to answer as many questions as you have, and then even more. We want you to know every choice, so then you can lead with YOUR Choice! 

  1.   Do not compare yourself or your dream to others.

When you stop comparing yourself to others, you feel empowered. All of our journeys and dreams are different, your success means doing the best you can, with what you have, wherever you start. It also means to continue exploring the possibilities available to you and surrounding yourself with people who hold your success as the top of their priorities.  

Over and over we hear from our customers that they thought something was not possible for them because of costs, health, or other limitations, and they were very surprised to learn that what they thought was a limitation, actually had many possibilities. Ask yourself, “What would I do if I had no limitations”, or “What would I do if I knew I could not fail?” Let us brainstorm with you and equip you with options.

When you truly own your dream of having a baby, you are unstoppable. 

I believe in you and your dream!

P.S. To hear the interview with Pradeepa, click here: https://www.facebook.com/AdonisFertilityInternational/videos/624265248093328/

Guest Post by Maria Feekes, Director, Adonis Fertility International

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